Seduction Blog

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Dating Tips for Men: Time Management

Dating can be your best friend.

…OR your big enemy.

A lot of time, a man can feel like a slave to his natural need to procreate.

Then there goes a common quote,  “He thinks with his… You know.”

Well it can be hard to NOT think that way if you aren’t physically satisfied.

But men are also goal oriented.

We make our actions to achieve things and influence the world in a positive way.

I’ve personally faced one of the biggest challenges and it is balancing the two - my carnal obsession and achieving my goals.

When you are single, dating can consume a lot of time. Women will suck away at your time if you don’t know what you’re doing.

Before you know it, you are spending hours in the park, feeding the birds and cuddling…now

there’s nothing wrong with spending quality time with your girlfriend, AS LONG AS YOU DON’T compromise YOUR GOALS IN LIFE.

Goals take time, likewise to women.

In fact, it’s a woman’s NATURE to get the man’s time - it’s her way of getting you to invest in her. If she gets pregnant there’s a

lesser chance of you leaving her (this comes from our caveman days, so to speak).

It is really tricky to manage your time with women. You see, most men want to give their time to women. By nature men are “givers.”

They like to please women, protect them, and give them good feelings.

Guys have also a urges that can completely take over your thinking.

Both of these things can get in the way of you making the most of your life, your time.

I want you take a moment and ask this to yourself, “WHAT DO I REALLY WANT TO GIVE TO WOMEN?”

Now I know it wasn’t about “money,” or “control over my life,” or “lots of my free time.”

It was probably something like “good feelings, sexual pleasure, relaxation, excitement, feeling of safety, make her smile or feel good about herself, etc.”

I think men have problems with how they use their time with women in two ways.

First, they think that the gifts they REALLY want to give aren’t that valuable, so they overcompensate with other stuff - like spending too much time or money on a woman.

Second, men think that they are “getting” something valuable when a girl spends time with them.

Guys was brainwash by the society to believe that women are a prize to attain, and that there’s some inherent value in a pretty face.

It’s not TRUE!

The best thing is to see women for what they are, nothing more, nothing less. They are cute, sometimes fun, but ultimately not that important, AND THEY CAN’T COMPLETE YOUR LIFE!

Now it is really hard to break out of this mental prison of feeling inferior to women.

Your mental habits are subtle and hard to notice because you’ve been doing them for years.

Young men are taught that their urges is crude and silly, and that it is just a favor that women ALLOWS them to mate with them.

There’s a syndrome that I call a “doofus dad” syndrome. There’s another societal factor going on. In almost every TV commercial and sitcom, the “dad” or “boyfriend” or “husband” is a dopey, incompetent goof, and the mom/daughter/girlfriend/wife has to use her superior intelligence to fix the situation.

This leads to the perception that women are “better,” and thus, their time is more valuable than yours.

If your time is not so valuable, then you will feel obligated to give her LOTS OF IT.

But here’s the thing - you won’t be present for most of that time, if you are giving a woman too much time. You will be distracted, resentful, you will give her your “half-assed” attention.

I just realize this after analyzing lots of dates I went on women.

After that I started to give my FULL ATTENTION to women even though I’m only giving a smaller amounts of my time.

Aside from making our time better, this creates a VAST ATTRACTION because I left women craving more.

Now my girlfriends can’t get enough of me - in fact, I don’t GIVE THEM “enough.”

Ask you know, “enough” would mean, “overexposure” to me, and women can’t be pulled to what they already have.

The proper way to manage your time is by being HONEST. And I don’t recommend you to play games with women and pretend to be busy or whatever.

No need of games, just be real with the girl - and don’t spend more time that you want.

Enjoy whatever free time you have with women but still with focus on your personal goals. Be the man on the go.

Now in a short amount of time it requires that you are able to meet a lot of women, which I’ll have to cover in another newsletter.

It’s not good to see that men waste their lives chasing and “putting up with” girls, and then they are left out ALONE.

Remember that women aren’t property that you can keep or somehow bring with you when you die.

It doesn’t mean that you can “keep” the women if you invest all your time with her.

One more thing here - if you start being honest with the amount of time you are willing give to a woman, you may feel GUILTY.

It’s either a girl will try to make you feel guilty, or you will feel it on your own. This is ok, it just means you have a weak focus.

If you are following your true ways, it will usually from the social norm.

If you are in the habit of adopting the values that others try to impose onto you, you will probably experience some tension, guilt, discomfort, even loneliness at first.

That’s why I set and develop the Attraction Code. It’s all about self-control, finding true path, and letting the real ‘you’ emerge from within.

And there’s no need for us to impose our goals onto you. Given the proper guidance, I know you are able to do that for yourself.


Vin

Dating Tips: Attracting a "10

If you are interested in meeting, attracting and keeping a 10, then I think you’ll find this letter very interesting.

But first off, let go waaay back…

When I was in high school, there was this girl in my class who was perfect.

She was intelligent, cool, and so beautiful that it was hard to look at her (and yet I couldn’t stop my eyes looking)…

She was friendly to everyone and was one of the popular kids in school.

We talked occasionally, and looking back I realize we were flirting (I was too stupid to realize at the time).

I wanted to ask her to senior prom so badly…but I chickened out at the last minute.

It was a few years later that I realized that the girl had a crushed on me all the senior year.

I’ve talked to a lot of guys and this experience seems pretty common, there was this ONE SPECIAL GIRL who you crushed on from afar, or you missed an opportunity with her, or she broke your heart…

Ah, the unreachable “10,” a perfect woman that every men dream but seems hard to attain.

I have a lot to say about the concept of “10’s,” In deeper sense they are another “breed” of women, but it is on the way they think that makes them so.

Understanding the reality of the extremely beautiful women and understanding your own fascination for a perfect women will help you resolve this conundrum, and might even help you in finding your “perfect girl.”

First of all, the concept of a “10” is a myth. There is no such thing as a perfect human being. No woman is more “valuable” just because she looks nicer than other women.

The woman that is perfect for you is the one who can turns you on and have a great chemistry with you. That is the only true “10”.

Following this reasoning, the world is full of 10’s, given you have the skills to meet a lot of women and create options for yourself.

Treating a woman differently than other women just because she is prettier is a recipe for failure.

Why?

Because almost all men do that.

The girl knows what you are about and she sees you as a shallow guy.

But there definitely are certain women that seem on another “level” of beauty than the rest. These women get treated much differently than other women.

You need to understand on how you will deal with these kinds of women.

Like I said, you shouldn’t treat them “differently.”

Let me clarify.

You shouldn’t treat a woman BETTER than the other women. But there are things that you need to know.

First, she is sick of guys chasing her for her looks alone.

She wants to be appreciated for her personality more than anything else.

Now for your own sake I’m going to give you a heads up.

There are two types of “10’s.”

Low self-esteem and high self-esteem.

The pretty common is the low self-esteem 10’s. Women here have a guilt complex. Because they are used to being wanted for their looks, but they know that they didn’t EARN that attention.

In fact, most of their lives are probably coasted, and are in complete dumbasses.

It may sounds not good  but I call it like it is.

These type of women will respond to jerk-behavior. Taking away their validation will make them flip out and do anything to get it back.

Anything.

(Aside from that, these women usually suck in bed and are total head cases when you get involved with them.)

Meanwhile, the high self-esteem 10’s are women that have had a taste of the elite - early from the start they realized that high levels of society were attainable to them, they exert an effort be intelligent, successful and make the most of their lives.

These women know that they are just a little closer to a great life than everyone else, and so they are motivated to put in the extra effort.

Usually HSE 10’s are intellegent, have good attitudes, have a direction in life and have lots of interests beyond being clubbing.

Actually, most of beautiful women I’ve dated didn’t even go to the club. They like to spend their evenings being with their families, reading, or having a nice dinner with friends (or studying if they were in college).

And here’s another interesting thing. These women are single for long periods of time while in-between boyfriends. Why?

It is because they have high standards for themselves, and this makes most men either too intimidated to ask them out, or act too needy and pathetic around them, it’s rare that they meet another man who is on their level.

But here’s the good news. These women are the easiest to attract when you understand The Attraction Code.

The Attraction Code is about being the best man you can be, being a “male 10.”

You will notice an interesting thing if you start to apply the Attraction Code.

You’ll get odd responses from less attractive women - they will occasionally be rude to you because they know they’re not on your level - it’s what I call the Auto-Rejection Mechanism. Some women will try to protect themselves from being rejected by you, by rejecting YOU first.

But the most attractive, cool women will respond much differently…you’ll be amazed to see the most beautiful women warm right up to you as soon as you approach - whether on the street or in the bar - because they can see that you are on their “level.”

She thinks to herself, “finally, a guy who can hang with me; he’s confident and treats me like a real person. And he’s the only guy who’s actually tried to talk to me today, instead of whistling from his car.”

The Attraction Code is meant for these kinds of women. Of course you’ll also enjoy plenty of “adventures” with all kinds of women, but ultimately this is about having the option of dating the hottest, highest quality women.

There are bunch of 10’s out there waiting for you.

Don’t spend another year missing something that you could’ve been enjoying right now.


Vin

Facts about Storytelling

I will be sharing with you today a very important and powerful subject when it comes to meeting and holding the interest of a women and anyone in your life.

This subject is no other than Storytelling and when used correctly, can make your desirability with women sky rocket.

But Before I jump into the tips and secrets behind successful story telling. I want to clear up a few myths when it comes to the matter of story telling.

Myth one: My stories have to be true and about me.

Now this is ultimately up for you to decide but as long as you keep the conversation fun, apply the right story telling techniques, and can keep the conversation moving, then your story does not have to be true.

Even if the women knows that the story is true, if you kept it fun, she will be entertained and most likely run with new conversation topics developed from your stories.

I am not encouraging you to lie though, the most powerful stories are ones that are true and come from a place of emotion.

You can be so over the top with stories where the unbelievably becomes so fun that she gets involved and becomes part of a newly painted reality that you and the girl get to share and more importantly create together. (This becomes a key factor in “Role Playing” and by mastering storytelling, your creativity in “Role Play Conversations” raises but sadly, the subject of role playing will have to be saved for a later issue.)

However I think the biggest misconception is not whether the stories have to be true, but is more about whether or not they have to be about the story teller.

One of the main goals of story telling is to communicate to the listener about you. Surprisingly, it is easier to convey things about yourself by HOW you tell a story, not the actual content of it.

Through the power of expressions, energy, and vivid language, you can convey to your listeners such things as, dominance, humor, interests, and over all personality.

When applying the proper techniques of a story, you should be able to repeat what you heard on the news but in such a fashion that directly makes you more interesting and displays your personality.

Myth Two: As you get better with women you become less dependent on story telling.

Now there is some truth to this myth in the sense that you do not go into interactions with pre-scripted stories as much as you may starting out. However, it is through the skills that storytelling develops that make you less dependent.

Instead of going into in interaction with a story you have made up or written down and rehearsed, you are able to share any subject in an interesting fashion that makes people listen.

This skill is enhanced by applying the arts of storytelling and is one of the key reasons learning and mastering storytelling is a great way to improve not only your skills with women, but your overall social skills.

What is storytelling  > > >

Storytelling is the direct means of communication when highlighting important parts of your life to the listener. Not only through context, but through delivery.

Why is storytelling important > > >

Storytelling plays a very important part in getting to know someone and the great thing about telling a story, is that it creates so many other subject matters to talk about and that a story is almost always followed by another story.

There are many reasons storytelling is important and if you are not currently utilizing storytelling then consider these following facts:

* Storytelling is a great way to save dying conversations

This is one of the most common problems that I see with many guys. An interaction will be going great, then conversation starts to die and there is that awkward silence. This is a great time to bust out a story from your arsenal and revive the interaction.

Knowing you are armed with a story creates more approach confidence when entering an interaction.

People are afraid to enter interactions because of the fear of running out of things to say. By developing a great story or two and keeping them in your back pocket for when you need them creates a great since of confidence during the initial approach and can really help limit the anxiety that one gets when approaching a beautiful women. You are guaranteed that the interaction will last at least the length of your story.

* Storytelling is a great way to display dominance

When you are telling a story the right way, all eyes are on you, you are the center of attention, and everyone lingers off your next word. Holding the attention of the group through storytelling puts you in a dominant frame of you being the leader of the interaction and everyone else being the listener, waiting to see where you take the group next.

* Storytelling develops stronger social skills

This is one of the biggest reasons that I like to make sure everyone masters storytelling. Through storytelling you learn to capture the entire attention of the group. Also you directly convey your personality and it gets you accustomed to doing so. The skills that are developed from strong storytelling directly carry over into your social personality that make all conversation with you more exciting and vivid. The expressiveness you show in stories ties into your future interactions and directly improves your social personality.

* You can convey things through storytelling that you normally could not say.

There may be some interesting details of your life that said outside the context of a story may come off as bragging. But in a story, these little details are never the subject of the story thus they remain subtle but are powerful when displaying aspects of your identity.

What you convey through your stories is how you will be remembered.

Unlike most things you say during an interaction, a good story is unforgettable. How many times have you had someone tell you about some crazy story that one of their friends told them? Stories have been passed down for ages; it is an old custom and still exists till this day. The girl should be able to look back on the interaction and be like “Oh yeah, that was the guy who (did whatever interesting activity that relates to you).”

Now that you have an idea of why storytelling is so effective and what you should be aiming for when telling a story. We are going to work on creating your very own powerful stories that cannot be neglect. All this will be covered in Part II of this newsletter, but there is an exercise I want you to do right now so you can directly apply all the tips and tactics to create an amazing story.

Exercise 1: Write down anywhere from seven to ten moments in your life that you feel changed or defined who you are.

Ideas: Vacations, Life/Death Experiences, an unforgettable concert or sporting event, a moment you succeeded, something funny that happened to you or a friend.

This can be happy, fun, or even sad (not depressing) but we do learn through negative experiences. We will eventually cut these down to just a couple stories in Part II but for now I just want you to get into the habit of taking note of interesting experiences in your life.

If you have a funny story then that is just a humorous time then feel free to include that. But even if the story does not seem major yet entertaining, the fact that you can remember it means it has a bigger effect than you realize.

I have already anticipated that there are going to be people that would say they have no interesting stories. This is absolutely not the true; everyone has something interesting that has shaped who they are. Don’t be modest; even if it’s a silly story write it down. You can’t be afraid to share a story, sometimes they are hard to think of and if you really can’t think of a past story, starting paying more attention to your every day life. And if you still can’t think of one then go take a vacation, you will return with hundreds of them.

So many things happen in one day that people don’t even think would be a story. But every past event being told is a story. There is no excuse not to have one.

Exercise 2: Write down at least 5 things that you would like people to know about you.

Ideas: Hobbies, Sports you play, instruments you play, your job, your goals, your skills and achievements.

This is going to tie into personality conveying. Think of the things that you would like any friend or new acquaintance to know about you. These are the things that directly relate to your identity and make you who you are. Do not be surprised if these things are directly related in some way to the stories you wrote down in exercise one.

Now save this list, we are going to use it a lot in Part II of this newsletter to construct a powerful stories that you can always rely on. Also I will further go into the skills of storytelling and how to use them to make every story and conversation more interesting.

I am going to do this very exercise along with you guys so you will get to see my story end product as well.

So, just keep an eye for the next letter and get ready to really take storytelling to the on the action.

Useful Mindsets for Disarming Male Competition

Have you avoided approaching a girl just because she is talking to another guy?

Or maybe you saw a group of girls with one or two guys with them and you ASSUMED the guys were cooler than you so you avoided approaching because you feared embarrassment.

There are two reasons why guys have a fear in talking with women who were with other guys.

Most guys when they saw the girl being with another guy, they think it is her boyfriend.

This isn’t a real reason to not talk to a woman, especially in a bar - it’s a social setting where people meet other people. Plus - she’s not his “slave” - she’s a human being, not a piece of property, so she is free to talk to whomever she chooses.

You will extremely look confident if you approach more often a woman who is “with” a guy and this can draw out the guy’s jealous side, making him look weak and insecure.

The second reason why guys don’t approach woman who is “with” a guy points to a deep insecurity based on a simple misconception.

Men tend to be threatened by other men, instantly assuming that the “other guy” is stronger, cooler, or somehow more powerful.

This is founded in an ancient survival strategy that has been hardwired into the human brain.

It’s often hard to tell who the more “dominant” human is in any given interaction. The social hierarchy is very subtle, and mostly unconscious. So when a male is confronted by another male, he doesn’t know how dominant the other guy is.

He doesn’t know if he will be embarrassed verbally, or as was probably common thousands of years ago, beaten up.

To assumed that the guy is a threat is the safest way to play. Because guys that are too bold may have won a few confrontations, but it will take them a single mistake that can end up their game.

And then their genes were eliminated from “race” so to speak.

So the guys who played it safe, and avoided confrontation usually lived long enough to reproduce and survive.

The irony of this is that nowadays this hard-wired survival strategy is the basis for most approach anxiety - guys avoid women unnecessarily because they are making false assumptions.

The thing is, most times when you see a woman talking to another guy in the bar or club, she’s not WITH him.

They JUST MET!

For many instances I’ve approached a girl with a guy thinking it was her boyfriend, then only to find out that he was just a random dude who just approached her. Or he was just a friend or relative.

I have regrets to those times that I’ve missed so many opportunities talking to a woman just because I saw her with another guy. And this brings me to my first point:

YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT HE MEANS TO HER. DON’T ASSUME THEY ARE TOGETHER UNTIL YOU SEE PHYSICAL EVIDENCE.

Approach a woman so that you will know what they really are. Just remember to be alert and respectful, because in the off chance they are together, the guy may be the insecure jealous type and start a physical confrontation.

So use your head - just don’t limit your options by making false assumptions.

The idea that the other man can be more “dominant” that you are is the next important thing that I want to talk about.

The concept of the alpha male is completely outdated. In the caveman days, the alpha male had real power - he had access to resources like food, and was physically stronger, so he could beat up competitors.

But ask yourself if those same power are still existing today. Every man with a source of income can survive on his own - if you’re reading this, you probably have an access to your needs like food. You’re all set.

Plus, it’s illegal to just beat people up. My point is, physical strength is pretty much irrelevant in the modern world.

You’ll always end up losing if you attack another person because the police always win.

You are LETTING RANDOM GUYS STOP YOU FOR NO REASON! if you are thinking about it.

Just excuse my French, but who is HE to say who YOU talk to???

It was annoying - remembering all the girls I missed out on because I was scare about some DUDE. And I get mad knowing that the other guys are dealing with some crap!

You are going to look back on all the things you did and didn’t do, when the time comes that you’re on your deathbed. How painful it is to say “I haven’t approached that girl because I was scared of another guy,” or “I could have enjoyed being with so many beautiful women if only I have approached them even if they were TALKING to another guy.”

I don’t want to happen that to you.

So let’s understand it deeply. Seeing the other guy as more dominant means you don’t really understand dominance.

You see, you instantly consider yourself NOT dominant when you’re concerned with who is more dominant. There’s a better focus.

To be dominant, you must first THINK like a dominant man. And dominant men don’t think about who is dominant. So what do dominant men think about? Whatever it is they are doing or want.

So when you see another guy talking to a group of girls. Focus on the girls instead of worrying who is the dominant between the two of you.

It’s proven to be a waste of time if I have to acknowledge other guys. Out of 10 women, 9 of them doesn’t even know the guy - they just meet him.

Or if they do, he’s a friend of ONE of the girls, and the rest barely know him.

It’s seldom for women to go out with a guy they are dating - normally they will bring a guy that is more of a protector/friend because a guy like that is more valuable when they go out on the town.

And aside from that, if he IS with one of the girls, then it will be a fair game because it means that he’s NOT with the other girls.

If you are concerned with who’s the alpha male, then you are NOT the alpha male by definition. As a matter of fact, it’s questionable whether alpha males truly exist in the modern era.

Avoid some assumption, just get your focus in a USEFUL place, and don’t allow some random dude to stop you from enjoying YOUR LIFE!